Contributed by Steve Goldberg

Synchronicities are a huge part of my life experience and, I believe, a significant part of what it means to live an Upside perspective.  By “synchronicity”, I’m referring what can happen when we practice the art of being open, alert, and curious within ourselves and towards our surroundings (in synch) so that we can observe and attract the people and opportunities into our lives that we might otherwise have ignored or missed.

I further believe that these unpredictable events are the result of unexplainable forces which can impact and influence the course of our lives in positive and meaningful ways.  For me it’s about paying attention while staying open to and curious about the signs and signals around me.  I have been rewarded abundantly in my life with this approach.

In last week’s column I shared the story of how, through a series synchronistic events, I met Nelson Mandela in 1990 the day after his release from prison.  In my reflections over the years on the events of that amazing day, I am struck by how easily I could have missed it all.

These were some of the things that occurred behind the scenes:

• I had initially planned on leaving Africa the day prior. My flight was canceled at the last minute and I had been given a re-routing option, but my inner voice told me not to travel that day and instead stay another day.

• I called and even though the hotel was fully booked, I somehow managed to extend my stay. I had no idea that this was the same hotel that Mandela would be visiting.

• I got back to my room exhausted from the airport ordeal and the toll of the heavy work schedule I had experienced in the preceding several weeks.  I was so tired that I could have quite easily slept the rest of the night away.  Instead, my instincts told me to go out, get some air, and do some exploring.

• My curiosity was rewarded by arriving at the reception line forming to view Mandela walk the red carpet laid out in front of our hotel lobby.  If I hadn’t heeded my sense of curiosity, I would have missed the next wonderful opportunity as well: running into my long lost friends who were now working with Mandela.  They arranged to sneak me into the State dinner that evening and, later, meet him in person.

Experience has taught me time and again that, as John Lennon so eloquently put it, “Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans.”  What’s often difficult to grasp, particularly during challenging times, is that there are always solutions and sources of unseen help ready to assist if/when we are receptive to them.

Questions for reflection:

1. Have synchronicities been rare or common events in your life?
2. What are some examples of synchronicity in your life that had important meaning for you?

Contributed by Olga Dudek

I saw the above quotation on a card recently.  It made me laugh and reminded me of someone…me!

I realize that pausing to take a breath is sometimes so much more effective than being reactive, wherein I feel I instantly need to respond to a situation.  I often need to remind myself to focus on what is going on right now, in this unique moment, while giving my “mind chatter” time to quiet down.

This was exquisitely pointed out last week when I watched a beautiful video entitled Celebrate What’s Right with the World.   In this 22 minute video, Dewitt Jones (a world-class photojournalist for National Geographic) describes the process of “waiting for the right moment, being open to possibilities”.

An example that really stuck out for me was when Jones asked Maryanne Campbell, widely known as the finest weaver in Scotland, what she thinks about as she creates her intricate tapestries. Her reply: “When I weave, I weave”.

I decided to apply this kind of wisdom the next time I set out with my camera to a favourite nature preserve in my community.  I am aware of the shift that takes place in me when I step outside and look through my camera.  The world viewed through the lens of a camera creates a clarity that is often missed with the naked eye.

On this day, I quietly repeated the following words to bring myself more fully into the moment:

Clarity, focus, attention…  Clarity, focus, attention…

Ahhhh… everything else began to slide into the background — work issues, relationship conflicts, financial concerns, everything I had previously been thinking about.

I spent time watching a beautiful great heron wading in the water and grooming itself.  I marveled at the light playing off of his colourful feathers.

I snapped a few pictures and admired the result.  Deciding I had a good one, I almost moved on.  But I then I remembered and repeated my new mantra, “Clarity, focus, attention…” and patiently waited some more. Soon, two herons moved closer together and then I saw it, the “heart” created from their connection.  This was the result…

Photo by Olga Dudek, 2010

Celebrate What’s Right with the World (Dewitt Jones, National Geographic, 22 minutes) is well worth viewing, even if you only have time to see part of it.

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=43381348

Questions to ponder:

• Do you “suffer” from hurry-up-and-move-on-to-the-next-thing, like me?
• What values/gifts have you uncovered by being patient?

Contributed by Steve Goldberg

“Never doubt that a small group of committed people can change the world.

Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

- Margaret Mead

I wanted to share a special world wide event that began ten days ago.  It is the third annual Winter Feast for the Soul presented virtually around the globe for 40 days from Jan 15th – Feb 23rd, 2010.  Winter was chosen for the event because it is recognized as the ideal time to go deep and reconnect with spirit.

The idea for this inspirational event is to have thousands of people join daily in reflection, prayer and meditation through guided online sessions.  The organizers believe that the vibration we create has the power to transform our personal lives and our planet.

The event started in 2008 by one woman inspired by a three-line poem by the 13th century poet and mystic Jelaluddin Rumi:

“What nine months does for the embryo

Forty early mornings

Will do for your growing awareness”

There is no prescribed spiritual practice for this event.  People are encouraged to use a spiritual practice that brings them peace and stillness.  The idea is to set aside 40 minutes daily for spiritual practice with commitment to personal and planetary peace.

For some this may seem like an enormous commitment of time.  Rather than focus on the amount of time spent, please consider taking whatever time you can to reflect each day for the next 40 days about finding more personal and global peace in our world.

With all the natural and man-made disasters facing us today, taking time collectively to reflect on what’s possible, rather than what is can be enormously powerful!!

There’s also a beautiful video on You Tube which conveys the vision of this wonderful event.  See:

Questions for reflection:

1. Do you believe that your personal vibration and the collective vibration of others have transformative power?
2. What examples have you seen in your life when your peacefulness has helped to create calmness and resolution to a challenging situation?

Find out more about participating at winterfeastforthesoul.com. On the homepage you will find a link in the upper left titled Online Guided Meditations for 2010. Click on that link and you will open a page with all the meditations that will be offered this year. Click on the links to see the schedule and listen to audio recordings.

Submitted by Steve Goldberg

Welcome to 2010! I hope you’ve had a fun, love-filled, and reflective holiday season.   We at Upside have been busy these past couple of weeks brewing up some exciting changes. We will gradually be unveiling these new developments over the next several weeks.   Stay tuned…

During the break, I came across the following video (link below) and thought it spoke well to the power of ideas, the capacity of the heart, and the synchronistic wonder of our interconnected world.

Here’s the gist: on December 7th, 2009 at 1:30 pm GMT Starbucks invited musicians from all over the world to simultaneously sing together to raise awareness for AIDS in Africa. In that one breathtaking moment, musicians from 156 countries began playing “All You Need is Love” in unison!

When I think of love and the Upsides in life, I am reminded of one of my favorite Ben Franklin quotes:

“While we may not be
able to control all that
happens to us,
we can control
what happens inside of us.”

For me, nurturing an Upside perspective is first and foremost about self-love.  Independent of our circumstances, love of and belief in ourselves is key to what happens “inside of us”, particularly during challenging times.

We welcome you to sit back and take in all the love that these wonderful musicians donated to the world on December 7th.

Some questions for reflection:

• What part does love play in your life?
• What are some loving acts you’ve experienced from others that helped you get through tough times?

I want to introduce our 2nd guest contributor, friend and colleague Sharon Roberts. Sharon is a brilliant executive coach/public speaker and is passionate about the Upside message.

Please let us know at steve@2ndhalfmatters.com if you have Upside column ideas or would like to be a Guest Contributor.

Wishing you all a great week of experiencing the Upside,

…Steve

“I Want Somebody With Skin On”

By guest contributor Sharon Roberts

Lately I’ve often been reminded of the story of the little boy who woke up from a terrifying nightmare and cried out, “Mommy, Daddy I’m scared…I had a really bad dream!”

His father responds in a tired, sleepy voice, “Go back to sleep, it was just a dream.”

After a short pause, “But Daddy…I’m really, really scared and I want you to come in here and be with me.”

And in that dreaded you’re-a-big-boy-now tone of voice Mommy and Daddy tell him, “Just go back to sleep – God is with you.”

Just about the time they think he has drifted back to sleep, content that he has God on guard at his bedside, the little guy adds real texture to his plea, “I know God is with me – but I want somebody with skin on.”

Oh how I love the plain and simple honesty of this child! More than a time or two when our day has gone weird or life seems to have gone right off the rails, we can identify with this child, can’t we? When we’ve done it all: prayed, meditated, kept a stiff upper lip, let go, and hung on – what we want and need is “somebody with skin on” to comfort us.

My experience

A couple of years ago I was at a conference and was delighted to see a “somebody” who, 10 years before, had given me a complimentary note about how I had handled an important business event. I went over and thanked Travis for how much that detailed, encouraging note had meant to me through the years, especially in times of complicated circumstances.

He couldn’t believe I remembered the note and was floored that I carried it with me in my portfolio. At that point, the colleague standing next to Travis reached into his briefcase and pulled out a similar, well-worn note written by Travis.

Travis was clearly moved. When he finally found his voice, he stammered out, “I used to always write notes to people thanking them for what they did. I haven’t done that in a long time. I will start writing notes again…I didn’t know it mattered so much”.

We are all “somebodys.” Many of the somebodys in our own lives have no idea that the little things they’ve said or done made a difference at all. My sense is that, like Travis, it’s vitally important for them to know, so please tell them!

It’s reassuring for all of us to know that little things matter. We don’t have to be famous or appear on Oprah to make a powerful difference to those we care about. As Gladys Stern said, “Silent gratitude isn’t very much to anyone.”

Click play below for your daily dose of feeling good (illustrating the sweet comfort of a hand to hold):

Reflecting on the Upside
Take a moment to think about all the “somebodys with skin on” who have been there for you when you needed help, whether you asked for it or admitted you were in need.

• What did they do: call you, email, or show up in person to cheer you up?
• Do you still have any mementos from those times, e.g. cards or notes?
• If so, have these been a source of inspiration for you over the years?
• Can you recall how it felt to be on the receiving end of their words or acts of kindness?
• Can you think of someone right now who still doesn’t know how much something they said or did, meant to you? Is there a way to let them know?
• Can you imagine ways to begin spending more time in “somebody mode” yourself, giving others the kind of feedback and support that means so much to you when you receive it?

“Giving is the shortest distance to becoming most alive.”
– Steve G.

This week’s column highlights a short audio file and a 2nd essay from the “This I Believe” series (you can listen or read using the links below) by author Isabel Allende. It focuses on two key Upside to the Downturn principles: building resilience and making a difference in the lives of others.

Allende’s busy life was forever changed when her adult daughter Paula became seriously ill in the early 1990’s and did not recover from a coma. The author shares the insights and life lessons that became clear to her through the journey of taking care of Paula during her illness, grieving her death, and adjusting to life without her.

Her personal message of discovering the essence of love and the purpose of giving is powerful.

P.S. Some of you may not have gotten last week’s column entitled: “Wisdom of a 7 Year Old”. Please click here to listen to an amazing young man.

“In giving, I connect with others.”
– Isabel Allende

Click Here to Listen to ‘In Giving I Connect with Others’ by Isabel Allende

Read Transcript

Consider the upside:

Take some time this week to look back on challenging times in your own life, whether these challenges were physical, emotional, financial, or in a relationship with someone else.

• What did you learn about yourself?
• What do you do better or differently as a result?

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